Top ten rules for men in the PMS-ING Club ( the PMS-ING club is a place for men to go to get advice on how best to handle Women PMS-ING )

1. the first rule of PMS-ING club, is you don't talk about PMS-ING club.

2. Don't ask about it, don't even hint about it. If you mention PMS-ING in any way, shape, or form, you have drastically increased your odds of getting kicked in your tender region.

3. While we are on the subject of talking. it's best if you just didn't. there are only three things your PMS-ING woman wants to hear....
   * I'm sorry, you're right. I'm an idiot.
   * I just finished cleaning our bathroom and while I was in there, I went ahead and ran you a hot bath. let me know when you get out, because I've been really looking forward to giving you a backrub.
   * Wow, have you lost weight

4. If you offer a "back rub" remember, sometimes "back rubs" are just "back rubs" and not a count down to launch your pocket rocket. This would be one of those times.

5. There are two words that will help keep your PMS-ING woman some-what calm, those two words are "Ice Cream." Make sure you happen to have 2 or 3 tubs of it, in various flavors. Oh, and just because you bought it, does not mean that you get to touch it... ever.

6. When you notice your woman inhaling every ounce of food, like she was a sumo wrestler trying to qualify for a higher weight class, don't say a word about it. It's o.k. to let her know she has part of a chicken leg stuck in her teeth. Just make sure you use the words, "pretty" and "skinny" when you do.

7. Unless you are physically dieing, I mean shot 6 times and about to pass out from blood loss, don't complain about any of your ailments. Any gripe you have about being tired or achy will not be met with sympathy.

8. Keep your house stocked with a lot of alcohol. Even if she doesn't need it, trust me, you will.

9. During The PMS-ING week-ish, it's best to let your wife have control of things. Such as, the t.v. remotes, car radio, bank account and your life.

10. Even if your wife decides to nickname her time of the month, such as "Aunt Flow is in town for the week." Doesn't mean she wants to hear what you call her PMS-ING, "Hummer-Week."