It;s not that i;m smarter than you, it just that you're dumber than everyone else.

I don't believe plastic surgery, But in your case, Go ahead.

WOW! you have a huge pimple in between your shoulders! Oh wait that's your face.

Is being stupid a profession or are you just gifted?

You don't have to disrespect and insult others simply to hold your own ground. If you do, that shows how shaky your own position is.

Are you always this Stupid or are you making a special effort today?

Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot I only exist When you need something.

Some people are such treasures you really just wanna bury them.

It would be significantly easier to wish you a happy birthday if you were on Facebook.

By all means move at a glacial pace. you know how that thrilss me

Thanks for sending me a group text! Now, I will get text all day, from your friends! Awesome!

Are they twins? No, I found the extra kid in the parking lot and thought. why not?

Hey, are you crying? No, I was pretending that I was a fountain!

Buying stuff at le store. are you buying all these? No, I'm stealing them, I just wanted to show you first

Me washing my car. Sup derp. washing your car? No, just watering my car to see if it grows into a bus!

Le abnormally tall me. meeting new people. "OMG, you are sooo tall do you play basketball? Um, no.. you're short do you play miniature golf?

If I could turn snarky sarcasm into a paying job, I could be employed for infinity

Did you fall off the stairs? No, I wanted to kiss the steps. Have you been robbed? No, I gave them my things as a gift and they ran away because of their happiness. Did you take a bath. No, I was seeking for Nemo in the toilet. Are you going to pay with a check? No, I am writing a poem